Confused

I have come to a conclusion atlast that I am the most confused person alive on earth.
Whatever I do....I dont understand why I did....I did because I liked or it attracted me....
At night I talked to my old friend, even his name is Abhishek, he told me that I am enjoying life with a very good job, nice pay and a cool place to stay. Now that is not true...grass is greener on opposite side that is the reason why my life seemed very pleasant to him.......coming back to the topic......

After talking to Abhishek, I looked at my past... and thought about the risks I have taken and the way of life I have chosen....


after pondering for sometime I realised that I had been a confused person all my life...
In school days...I loved literature.I liked to read literature classics of Ruskin bond, Rabindranath Tagore etc and had decided that I will study arts in my college...but I got very good percentage in my exams and had to take Science as my major. This was the punishment for bringing good percentage. I never argued my fathers decision that I should opt for Science and become an engineer like him....my father is really very great....whenevr I had to take decision....he gave me one...


My love for literature perished in the burner of chemistry practicals and was not able to revive from the shock which the electric wheatstones bridge gave him.....I was in the realm of Science now....I never enjoyed studying science.....During this period i fell in love with chemistry. I liked the classical physics also....but after my 12th grade exams, in which I scored very good marks again, I was sent to engineering college to study mechanical engineering.(again as a punishment)

Now I dont have a special love for mechanical Engineering...why I choosed that branch...even I dont know....happily I stated studying for my engineering studies....but it took just 1 year to realise that I dont enjoy studying machines and thermodynamics, machine design etc etc.


During second year of engineering I had an illicit affair with finance and business. I started loving finance and kept tab on happenings in bombay stock exchange and dreamt of playing good shots on dalal street...whe I passed out from my engineering....I was very well versed in Finance and stock markets.....even though I was an engineer I went straight to the offices of big stock brokers and applied for job. fortunately I got job in Sharekhan.com in equity sales.I enjoyed working there....but whenever my friend or relative asked....why I am not doing something in my field ie engineering....I felt very irritated....every now and then I was made to feel that what I was doing is wrong and I should work as an engineer in some company as I have received a professional education for that....you know...when you tell a horse that he is donkey 1000 times....he starts to believe that he is....same thing here....eventhough i was paid very well compared to my engineering firends....some times I had a feeling that what I was doing is wrong and I should work as an engineer.....confused with all these things I joined Forbes Gokak Ltd as market research engineer....now this was a job which I loved(again) the job as market research engineer was pretty challenging and informative....I got this job due to my work profile in sharekhan.com....and my knowledge on Indian manufacturing industry...

Its during this time I had an affair with software.....even in my college days i wa attracted to software and tried to learn few basics of it....

Now ...in forbes gokak ltd.....after being pleased with my job....company kept me as sales and application enginerr for solid carbide tools in Delhi....again i learned too much in this job....but then I suddnly realsed that I am enjoying the work which I am doing....now I am a trained mechanical engineer,also received training in operation of CNC machinery which is very Hi Tech and state of art machines....but I had interest still in literature...and loved to work on computers and softwares....

fortunately i got a job in zero.com,
now this is a company which makes CRM software and is about to step in field of advaced business analytics....I may have to get a good shot of softwares (Java, .net) to work comfortably here...then suddenly I realised that I am enjoying the job....there is a bit of business skills involved with analysis tools of finance....software my recent love...everything...

I am in love with this job...till a person comes and tells me...hey why r u doing this job...? this not a job of mechanical engineer....and again i will get confused....